Consistency & Commitment

Well hello again!

I fell off the radar for quite some time but I am back and making a revised commitment to you – and myself – because I really am blogging for myself, as free therapy, and secondarily for you, in case my rambles help you.

My commitment – I will post 2-3 times a week. Why so specific? Because setting parameters (ie: hard numbers) makes reaching goals actually tangible and tracking/metrics appeal to me (even though I would classify myself as the creative type vs math/science girl). As you can tell if you’ve perused my other posts, I am incredibly consistent in some areas of my life like working out, meal planning, making time for friends and family, etc..BUT..not so much when it comes to turning the focus inward and following through with activities that support me dealing with my inner issues. I use the word issues somewhat lightly, because hey, we all have our own issues and inner struggles. I plan to start digging down deeper on mine, hopefully it will be therapeutic because talking about my issues is incredibly challenging (even with my loved ones).

Let’s end on a lighter note, shall we ūüôā – it’s Saturday and rather rainy her in NYC but I’ve taken advantage of the indoor weather and cooked breakfast and lunch, deep cleaned the house and even spent 10 minutes meditating (so hard to actually do by the way).

I hope your Saturday proves to be enjoyable, productive or whatever you need to feel happy and at peace. I’ll be back early next week with recent eats, a fitness update,and with more on meditation.

Fertility Fun: Part 1

Hi there, it’s been a pretty chill day, as all Sunday’s should be. While most¬†of this¬†snowy weekend has been incredibly relaxing, I had an anxiety episode today. Recognizing¬†what triggers these¬†intense emotions is a full-time job guys..¬†yet¬†all morning I could feel “it” brewing.

The trigger was¬†related to my¬†fertility, or lack there of, a tough topic to casually talk about honestly. Here’s the thing, I feel like I’ve encountered numerous other ladies in their upper 20s and¬†30s that have experienced fertility issues. Sharing my past and progress may benefit you, and perhaps it will lead me to the happy ending I am hopeful for.

High School Days: Ah yes, where the story begins..WAY WAY back :). I was a late bloomer, so¬†my period didn’t begin until I was 16. I was totally fine with it, I danced and cheered, and not having to deal with a pesky period was a relief. I was petite but even then, my period only occurred 2-3¬†times a year. My doctor¬†wrote it off because I was active, a gymnast, and had low body fat. But once I started competing for cheerleading more frequently, I wanted¬†to know when my period would arrive (surprises aren’t fun in front of hundreds of people)..so I started on birth control at 17.

College Days: I kept taking¬†birth control through most of college, except during one¬†summer (when I was 21)¬†when I¬†thought a break from the pill was due. My period didn’t arrive during my four¬†month hiatus. I notified my doctor and she wasn’t concerned..a few months later I got back on the pill. I tried a few different pills through the years – Nuva Ring, Loestrin, etc.

Working World: I started getting nasty migraines after¬†my 27th birthday, I was taking far too many sick days¬†and couldn’t figure out what the cause¬†was. I went to a few different doctors and finally decided to quit the pill for good. I was in a committed relationship, and my boyfriend (future hubs) encouraged¬†me to do whatever it took to feel healthy again. A few days after I stopped the pill I felt better and after a few weeks, ¬†my headaches were nonexistent. I couldn’t believe quitting the pill did the trick.

A few months passed, then six, then a year..and I got rather¬†nervous about my period’s absence. My lady doctor ran a number of tests, including an internal ultrasound (ouch) and the diagnosis¬†came back as¬†“PCOS Lean”. Her recommendation¬†was to¬†wait until I’m ready to conceive, and then start intense doses of hormones to try to stimulate my period. She also emphasized that the sooner I start, the better my chances will be…no pressure..(tick tock, tick tock goes the¬†biological clock)

This diagnosis didn’t satisfy me, it felt like a¬†band aid. Why isn’t their a way to naturally bring my period back? What happens if I just wait and the hormones you prescribe don’t work?

In Part 2 I will share the non-traditional approach I took after my doctor’s diagnosis.

Is your period regular?